My Blog List

Our mission

Are you that special person who - weary from trudging the endless superhighways - just longs to camp next to a glorious oasis of the mind? Do you desire to explore new frontiers, splash in shared ideas, fill your belly with the refreshing fruits of inspiration, and bask in the gentle rays of fond reflection?

Well, you can fuck right off. This, my friends, is not that place. This place is... The ShadowLands.

Friday, June 26, 2009

Jokes condemned

The ShadowLands presents these "jokes" only with the understanding that our discerning readers will know far better than to spread them around:

* So, did you hear the Jackson 5 are offering 20 per cent off their next reunion tour?

* Farrah Fawcett gets to the Pearly Gates. St Peter says, "We have been expecting you Farrah. You have led such a good life that, as well as entrance to heaven, God and I would like to offer you one wish". Farrah scarcely needs to think about it. "Thank you, God, thank you St Peter. I would like you to end the suffering of each and every child..."

* I hear it was the second heart attack that killed Jackson - when he awoke and realised he was nowhere near the children's ward.

(More on the web reaction to this shock news over at Harry Hutton's.)

UPDATE: Some more "jokes" that we should all be extremely wary of in comments. Thanks to our vigilant readers.


kae said...

Michael Jackson passed away this morning from a massive heart attack.
Authorities have released a statement saying that they will melt his body down and make plastic toys so kids can play with him for a change.

Anonymous said...



Carpe Jugulum said...

I heard he was going to be buried at sea strapped to 2 bouys.

Egg said...

Wasn't he found alive at sea - bobbing up and down on a buoy?

Carpe Jugulum said...

Oh Egg, you are going to hell for that....which is ok...i know people there. lol

Mehaul said...

Only a few years ago during the collapsed mine crisis in Tasmania, Jackson left Beaconsfield in a real huff. It seems he had flown all that way from the US, in the belief that there were two trapped minors.

Infidel Tiger said...

Apparently he died of shock. He was looking at the Man in the Mirror.