Kevin Rudd: Well good morning, Chairman.
Ben Bernanke, (US Chairman, Board of Governors of the Federal Reserve): Good morning Mr Rudd, welcome to America.
Kevin Rudd: Well, I am here today, Mr Governor, to help you with the world financial crisis moving forward.
BB: Oh great. I mean, really we welcome any help with this.
Kevin Rudd: Well what I mean to say here is that the world financial crisis really is not acceptable.
BB: What do you…
Kevin: Well I mean, we must say no to the world financial crisis. Bricklayers and celebrities and bankers and real estate agents, taxidermists and broadway dancers – we all say no to the world financial crisis.
BB: So okay, no to the crisis, But what are you planning to do about it?
Kevin: - Well, this is a global world financial crisis, and it is time to say no. At summits. In our parliaments. At our barbecues we all say no. Under no circumstances are world financial crises acceptable. That’s what we say.
BB But really, Mr Rudd, why did you want to see me?
Kevin Rudd: Well, of course, I will be moving forward with action Mr Governor and here is what I am suggesting. Get this -Cate Blanchett and Hugh Jackman have decided…
BB: ...that you want to say no the world financial crisis? Can you stop saying well?
Rudd: Well! Not just say no, but moving forward, to bury some kind of time capsule, to fully encapsulate the extent to which we say no moving forward.
BB: Fuck me dead.
Rudd: Well, just say no. Got to go, I am moving forward to the UN. Tarquin?